Jasdero's Imaginary Friends
by A-Delicious-Cake-Recipe
Summary: WARNING: AU and slight Devitto/OC It had been three years since the day that they were engaged. It had also been three years since the discovery of the illness. Debitto had to choice between his lover or his mentally ill brother.
1. A Song I Sang For You

**Jasdero's Imagery Friends **

Chapter 1 - A Song I Sang for You….

It had been three years since the day that they were engaged. It had also been three years since the discovery of the illness. Debitto had a decision to make, either to fulfill his soon to be wife's wishes, or

continue taking care of his only brother, whose mental health seemed to become progressively worse each month. She had been nagging for Debitto to move his twin into mental hospital since the beginning

of her pregnancy. She argued,_ "Well, what happens when the baby's born? I can't have that crazy man running around here!"_

His rebutted,_ "Look, he just sits in his room all day, give him a break. It's not like he's been bothering you."_

She would sneer. _"Like you would know! I caught him looking at me changing into my nightgown three days ago! How innocent is that!"_

Debitto grimaced. _"He was probably looking for me, not you. He doesn't like you,"_ always adding to the end,_ "I couldn't see why."_ Jasdero heard this from his bedroom upstairs. He knew that Penelope hated

him with a passion. He was the one thing that kept them from marrying, hell, even being in close contact with each other, which made him wonder how she even became pregnant in the first place.

_"Debitto, either you send him the nut house, or we will NOT have this kid!"_ Such a mean spiteful woman... Jasdero couldn't understand how or why Debitto continued his relationship with her. She made

these kinds of threats whenever Debitto wouldn't give into her demands. His twin thought that he was too special to ever be tossed aside to fulfill that woman's spoiled brat complex, but love makes a person

blind and selfish for one's desire.

**November 1**

"Snow's on the ground, before it was coming from the sky, but now it's stopped crying." Jasdero uttered out loud, staring at the flakes that had collected on the front yard. "I don't know when Debitto's

showing up. He said he'd be back in a couple of hours. He took that evil woman with him. It's never fair, he's always with that woman."The voices spoke to him and he spoke back. "I know, she's so mean to

Jasdero, and Jasdero hasn't ever done anything to her~!" He continued to scan the outside world since for most of the three years he'd been at his soon-to-be sister in-law's house, the only times he had left

were to pick up his medicine with Devitto. "I'm hungry, oh hii~! Well I just can't go down there, what if Debitto and Penelope get home? All she does is yell at Jasdero. She hates me! It's not my fault she's

getting fat….." The voice he heard started to giggle, along with him. "Hehehe, if Debitto were here, he would have laughed too!" His giggling was only heard by himself and his 'friends'. The car pulled in, and

he watched as the woman with long, light auburn hair tried to exit the passenger side of the car, only to be stopped and helped out by his brother. "Let her get out on her own, she's only been pregnant for a

week," Jasdero spoke. In truth, Penelope was three months along, but Dero wouldn't know that,

_"It comes with the disease, he'll start to forget time, a week will be like a day, ten years will be to him a year….."_

The Doctor's voice made Debitto sad, and Dero didn't like it when his brother cried. "Her legs aren't even broken, and it's not like the baby is that big, so why do you have to help her up?" he observed. He

turned away, not wanting to see Penelope's smile. It was like seeing a tiger before it leaps onto its prey. Time passed, around fifteen minutes, according to Jasdero's approximation, making him wonder about

Devitto. Sitting on his bed he again thought aloud, "I know Debitto always checks on me after he comes home." The sound of a door opening and closing concerned Jasdero, what's going on down there? As

much as he would hate to visit anywhere else in the house because of Penelope, he wanted to see what his brother was up to.

Peeking only his eyes out from where the stairway ended, he watched the hallway fro his twin. Only looking into the dining room for a second he caught a glimpse of Penelope, she sneered. Devitto's voice

could be heard from the end of the hallway that was out of his twin's eyesight, as Jasdero waited patiently. Before he knew it, Debitto was walking back to the kitchen with groceries. Beaming from down the

hallway, his attitude more joyful than normal, He greeted Jasdero and Penelope as he set the bags of food on the dining room table.

"What's up? Decided to come visit us?" Debitto directed to Jasdero as he went over to Penelope whose grimace was plastered on her face. "Hope Ellie over here isn't trying to scare you off!" Her face was so

plastic when it smiled at Jasdero.

"I would never do that! Jasdero loves me, don't you?" Since Debitto's attention focused on Penelope. Debitto didn't see his twin shake his head horizontally. Penelope's expression just as cynical as the day

she meant Jasdero.

"Well, we were at the doctor's, and the baby is healthy," Debitto cheerfully announced as his fingers skimmed the top of Penelope's protruding stomach. Jasdero was scared to say anything, even if it was

positive. 'Ellie' as Debitto called her, would find a way to let her coldness seep into a warm hearted comment. Jasdero continued to stand on the last step of the stairway. "Jasdero?" Debitto called his brother

who continued to stare at him.

"Debitto, he's not all there, just leave him alone." He lightly pushed his fiancé's hand away and crept closer to Jasdero.

"We can go upstairs if you don't want to talk down here." Jasdero's head shook in a manner of yes.

In his bedroom Jasdero was back to being how his brother remembered him, happy. Jasdero sat on his bed, smiling with the most innocent child-like beam that always reminded Debitto why he loved him so

much. "So what did you do today?" Debitto asked as he stood in front of Jasdero's bed, playing with the light colored curtains.

"Well, I woke up just before you left, you said you'd be gone for a couple of hours, I waited, and waited, and waited, made a sandwich, and waited…." Debitto grinned.

"What else did you do besides wait?"

"The voices and I made a song up for the baby…."

"Well, can I hear it?" Jasdero smiled. He was glad that his brother's attention was on him, causing him to blush, but then he frowned.

"I don't think you'll like it…"

"Jasdero, I love you. I promise I'll like it." Jasdero again beamed before singing the lullaby.

_"There was a one baby-cradle_

_there was a one baby in the cradle_

_Then the one became two_

_The one baby-cradle_

_was surrounded by the mist_

_One star_

_flickering over the graveyard_

_And disappearing!" _

Jasdero's smile now seemed twisted to Debitto. How creepy the lyrics were, how Jasdero was singing it, and who inspired the lullaby. It rose too much concern for Debitto to not say something. "What… what

happened to the children?"

"I don't know. I guess they died, or something like that. That's what the voices told me…" Jasdero noticed the dread in Debitto's pupils. "I told you, you wouldn't like it; now you hate me just like

Penelope!" Tears rolled down Jasdero's cheeks as he knew that Debitto didn't like what he and his'friends' thought up.

"Jasdero, I don't hate you."

"Yes you do! They all said you would hate me if I sang it to you!" Jasdero shrieked.

"Jasdero…" Debitto crawled into bed with him. "Don't listen to the voices, you know I love you and you shouldn't doubt that." Debitto rested his head on Jasdero's shoulder as Jasdero wept into his pillow.

"I know, it's just that you've been treating Jasdero differently since he's been hearing his friends…" he uttered.

"I have to. You can't function without me, I guess with the baby and the wedding, I've been treating you more like a child, and I shouldn't."

"Dero doesn't mean to be useless, he wants to be smart like Debitto but no one lets him. They all say Jasdero's too stupid…" Debitto tighten his embrace.

"You've not useless or stupid, you just need help. You'd probably be smart like me if your medication continued to work." He started to rock his twin back and forth, cradling him.

"Why isn't Dero's meds working?"

"They just aren't," sighed, his smile starting to turn into a frown as he thought about what the doctors informed him. "But you're fine right? It's not like you've tried to hurt anyone."

"Jasdero has bad days." Again, terror weaved though Debitto's mind in the form of Penelope's voice.

_"Well what happens when the baby's born? I can't have that crazy running around here; he might try to hurt the baby!"_

"Devitto?" Jasdero tried to call his brother out of the trance. "Is Debitto okay?" As his day dreaming Jasdero became worried. The way he's looking at Jasdero was different, Jasdero doesn't like this.

"I'm sorry, I was thinking about something."

"Debitto, the voices are saying that you don't think I'm okay anymore. Tell them they're wrong." He held Jasdero, pulling him closer into their hug. _"Tell them that they're wrong, please, please tell them!"_ All

Debitto did was hug his sick brother, since he knew what he had to do.


	2. All The Colors You Want

I'm sorry if the format sucks, I'm trying really hard to make it so that its atleast readable, any tips on how to make it look better

please pm me, I'm new to the site.

* * *

Chapter 2 – All the colors you want

Night time wasn't easy on David, as he laid under the covers with Penelope, his mind endlessly on the same topic. '_What am I going to do with him?'_ David thought. '_Maybe Penelope is right, maybe he belongs in a home or something'_.

Down the hallway Jasdero's mind was much like his brothers, racing with thoughts, not the same thoughts, but thoughts. Jasdero was staring out of the window as he had already forgotten about David's concerns from earlier, in the

middle of night he's attention was focused on watching the snow fall. Much like himself his 'friends' were awake too. "I wonder if David will let me play outside tomorrow, I hope the snow is sticky enough to make a snowman!

Hehe…" he added. Yawning loudly and causing a great sense of fatigue to overcome his body. "I don't care if you guys stay awake, but why do you gotta make me an insomniac?" Jasdero cursed the voices.

Hours passed by and Jasdero didn't fall asleep, he attempt to, but stopped by a so called 'friend' of his. Always a simple phrase would be uttered into his ear to wake his brain, and stimulate every lobe. Among the confusion and mild

hysteria caused by a lack of slumber, Jasdero had started to daydream about years before his grim diagnosis.

_I was seventeen, I remember sitting in my math class still learning sixth grade algebra, my mind nowhere focused on the numbers marked on the white-board, more on the pearl paper lined with several blue horizontal lines, and a _

_bold red one going down the paper vertically. About nine other people the class, not including the poor teacher that had to put up with us. I never said much, it kept me out of any social groups, as sad as it sounds, thinking back; it _

_was probably the best for me. _

Jasdero didn't like it when his psyche reminded him of high school years, something time refused to eat. Not the memories of awkward adolescent times, but the face of relatives and small frivolously things, and happy days that faded

into oblivion. Of course time couldn't be blamed for all the dementia like symptoms, a person's memory can fade, much like their sadness or happiness, it brings about new feelings, but Jasdero would never accept that. Before the

disease Jasdero blamed not paying attention to detail, which would always fail him when it came to school related assignments. The truth with school that is, was that he was slow, very slow. At the age of sixteen his reading level had

matched one of a seventh grader, he had failed to learn simple algebraic expressions in the ninth grade, and took twice as long to learn given material than the other students in his class. That was with school, and when diagnosed with

schizophrenia he soon which his excuse from a lack knowledge, to it being the disease fault, till the destruction of his brain was too far gone for him to blame anything on his forgetfulness. His hand enclosed on the pillow case as he

attempted to fall asleep again.

Ten thirty in the morning, Penelope and David were down stairs very much awake, as for Jasdero, he was still resting from the night before. Penelope sat at the dining room table, waiting for David to finish cooking her early lunch.

"So is that brother of yours awake?" She asked her question laced with slight irritation. "He kept waking me up all last night; it's not good for the baby for me to be waking up all though the night." She added.

"He can't help it," David defended his brother.

"Then what can he help? Look sleeping isn't that hard, all a person was to do is relax and fall asleep, I mean I knew he was retarded but…" Her voice stopped as David scolded her with his facial expressions.

"Don't call him that, you know that hurts his feelings, and it's not very nice." David reminded his lover. Penelope turned away from him, being the spoiled brat that she was, she didn't like to take such a social punishment from David.

"God I need a smoke…" She uttered starting to tap her lengthy and expensive press ons against the wood table.

"You know it's not good for the baby, and it's not good for you either." David again preached. Penelope grinned

"I didn't know you were my Dad." She replied. David grinned with her.

"No, I just work for him." David answered. The way he responded to Penelope had turned her cheeks rosy and peach; the way he uttered those words had sounded so seductive to her.

"David." She spoke.

"Yes dear, your food is almost done." His voice loud and compliant,

"Can you come over here?" She asked. Without any clue of what she was up to, David did what she asked of him. "Can you sit down?" Again he did what he was asked of.

"Something wrong?" David inquired just before a long bewitching kiss was placed upon his lips. Now his own cherry tinted face was high on varies chemicals flowing throughout the veins buried deep within his brain. His hand

formed around Penelope's as they shared another kiss before he went back to cooking her lunch.

In his room Jasdero was playing with the voices in his head, knowing well that he wasn't leaving his room at all today. I-spy was the main game they played, one because of how quiet Jasdero could before he wouldn't not bother

Penelope, two because of how forgetful Jasdero was the game could never become old, and three because it was simple.

"I-spy something, purple!" The voices would try to guess what he was seeing "Nope! Try again!" Another guess "Nope, your wrong, but you were really close!" His giggling could be heard from the hallway. As he continued to play,

David stood outside his door overhearing his brother's voice. "I hope David takes me outside today, I know it probably won't happen…" Jasdero took a deep breath. "I haven't seen him all day today, I wonder what Penelope has him doing for her now?" An injection of anger was added to his voice at the last sentence he spoke. Now knowing that Jasdero was truly lonely David felt the strings on his heart being pulled.

"Hey Jasdero…" David called for his brother's attention as he entered his room. "It stopped snowing, do you want to maybe go outside and make a snowman?" David proposal bought delight to Jasdero expressed with a smile, and him

digging out his winter jacket from the pile of clothes in his closet.

The light weight spots of crystallized water floated downward as Jasdero finished make his snowman. Picket white fencing didn't allow anyone to actually see the childish sculpture Jasdero created, but nonetheless Jasdero was still

proud of it.

"Can we color it?" Jasdero questioned with such a innocent and oblivious manner. David who was finishing up the smaller details, such as the rock buttons and eyes let a light sigh of angst escape from his mind.

"Hold on." He uttered as he rammed a deep orangey carrot into the center of the snowman's face. Turning towards his brother almost buzzing with excitement brother, "Do you think I could leave you here well I go get the food

coloring from the house?" David explained, Jasdero head bobbing up and down. Waiting for his brother seemed to be a hard task to complete; Penelope normally didn't like Jasdero being outside of the house.

_David we can't just have him running around the streets here! What would the neighbor think! _

Penelope would shout.

Jasdero could never understand what the problem was in the winter why he couldn't be outside in the backyard that was gated with a privacy fence as tall as him. He knew that Penelope was embarrassed by him in more ways than one,

but never would a neighbor he thought would see him, well at least he thought. A rubber ball hitting the back of Jasdero head had caught the blond off guard. With the pastel baby blue poka-dot pink under his arm, Jasdero was able to

climb the fence so that he could look over to see who threw the ball.

"Excuse me mister, can I have my ball back?" The cutesy voice of a young girl caught Jasdero of guard; make him lose his grab on the fence. Re-climbing the fence his grip better than before, "I'm sorry that my ball fell into your

yard!" the girl continued to apologize. Without warning Jasdero feel from the fence back into his own yard. Then surprising the little girl with the ball being thrown back into her yard, Jasdero soon re-climbed the fence. The girls smile

enlarged his heart, she had been the first person in a long time for him to make a social contact, without David or Penelope doubting over him. "Thank you mister! Are you

that guy Miss Penelope is marrying?" An innocent question that made Jasdero blush from how wrong it sounded to him. With a quick gesture of his head moving back and forth from side to side, Jasdero and the little girl began to giggle. "Do you live in that house?" the little girl asked. Jasdero

shook his head up and down. "You have really long hair, I wish my hair has that long!" The urchin put her hands into her hood and held her short brown hair.

"Thank you." Was something Jasdero managed to utter.

"Are you shy?" the girl continued to question. Jasdero didn't comment back. "It's okay I won't make fun of you!"

"A little..." He voice anxious, but had managed to make the little girl smile. "People can't understand me when I talk."

"Why?"

Jasdero pointed to his head, "This" then pointed to his mouth "And this, don't like each other." An expression Jasdero was used to seeing when he spoke, confusion.

"Why's that?"

"My mind doesn't like to follow what my mouth and brain wants to say." He tried to express to the little girl.

"Weird, do you want to play ball?" She again questioned him. He shook his head from side to side. "Why?" the girl cried.

"My flesh won't let me." The little girl stared back at him strangely. His pupil's looking upward like he was constraining.

"My mind doesn't like to follow what my mouth and brain wants to say, it thinks its special, but it should know by now the other minds can't understand it half the time." The rambling scared the child and Jasdero knew it, his face

expressed all of the feelings his words couldn't articulate. The sound of the door from the back entrance escaped Jasdero's ears, but David's yelling sure didn't.

"What the hell are you doing?" David yelled. Jasdero waved goodbye to the little girl and jumped off from the fence. David grabbed his brother shoulder. "Come on get away from the fence before Penelope thinks you're talking to the

neighbors…."

Spray bottles filled with different colors of food coloring sat close to the snow figure, as Jasdero picked out what dye he wanted for his snowman.

"This is pretty." His hands enclosed onto the one filled with a deep violet tint. An almost psychedelic snowman graced their backyard. "You like it right?" Jasdero inquire from David. His brother grin let him know that yes, he did well

this time with his coloring skills.

"Just because I said you could have all the colors you want, didn't mean you had to use them all!" David mocked his Jasdero.

"But it's pretty." Jasdero spoke softly, his body starting to shiver.

"Come on let's get back inside, it's getting cold out here." David muttered under his own bitter from low temperatures voice. Entering the breezeway Jasdero continued to stare at the fence, the thoughts he could make out was only

those of more prolonged human interaction.


	3. It's Probably Just Hormones

I have no words to weave in detail how much I really dislike this that I'm posting this fic. I think I might figure out the issues with the formatting, if you actually think this is a good fic and if I've really fixed the

issue with the formatting think I should go back and fit the other two chapter so that they're easier to read please review saying so. I also want to apologize for the mess up last chapter were instead of Debitto I

put David, sorry about that. If I go back and fix the last two chapter's I'll make sure to change that.

* * *

Chapter 3 – It's Probably Just Hormones

Sunlight passed though the transparent curtains, waking Jasdero. He had again slept past noon, knowing that for some reason he had to be downstairs. For what, he wasn't sure.

"Yo Dero, are you ready?" Debitto called him.

"Devit?" Muttered Jasdero.

"I told you I was going to take you out in the backyard,"Debitto rasped. Excitement waved though Jasdero's body. Jasdero searched his closet for winter apparel resembling the same kind of joyful glee a child

would express after a virgin snowfall. "Hey, just meet me out there when you're ready." Debitto's footsteps teased him as Jasdero looked for his scarf.

After clothing himself in proper attire, Jasdero strolled down the steps but only to be met by Penelope's glare.

"What are _you _doing down here?"Peneople blared. A chill strung itself throughout Jasdero's body, he knew better than to respond to the fiery auburn woman sitting next to the kitchen table at his side. Continuing

on his merry way to the sunroom door adjacent to where he stood, Penelope again tried to deter him. "Where do you think you're going?" retorted Penelope. Another cold comment. Jasdero knew he couldn't blow

her off a second time.

"I'm going to play with Devi…" chimed Jasdero.

"Where? Outside?" Penelope snapped.

"Yeah…" Responded Jasdero.

"I better not catch you talking to any of the neighbors, you got me?"barked Penelope. Jasdero questioned how Penelope knew about the incident from yesterday. Penelope continued, "Especially the Walker's little

girl, you scared the living hell out of her and her parents." He shot Penelope a scowl, knowing the complete consequences that might occur if it upset his future sister-in-law. "You think you've seen me angry…."

Penelope threated. Debitto entered the room.

"You two playing nice?" Debitto retorted. Penelope grinned.

"Yes dear,"Penelope expressed. Jasdero stood in place, scared to perform any action.

"You gonna help me decorate the front?"Debitto questioned. Jasdero lit up.

"You're taking him in the front yard?" Penelope asked in shock.

"Well, if we put up the lights in the back, no one would see them,"Debitto explained, "Come on Jasdero!"

"Devit!" Penelope called him as she gestured for Debitto to move closer to her so she could whisper her concerns.

"What?" Asked Debitto

"Are you sure it would be a good idea to be taking him out in the front?" whispered Penelope.

"Yeah why?"

"I was talking to Mrs. Walker yesterday and she said that Jasdero was talking with her daughter over the fence," Penelope informed.

"And…?"

"He really scared her and I would really love it if you could maybe just put the lights up… without him." Jasdero overheard Penelope's sinister persuasion. "What if he runs off or hurts someone?"

"Look Ellie, I know you're concerned about him but I promise that he isn't going to run off or hurt someone when I'm around. God, you make it sound like he's some sort of puppy, "protested Debitto.

"Pfft more like one with rabies…"Jeered Penelope.

"Will you stop it with him? How would you like it if you had a mental illness and all I did was call you names! "Argued Debitto.

"Fine, I'm sorry, "remarked Penelope. Debitto pecked Penelope's lips with his.

"I promise he'll be fine with me. There's nothing you need to worry about," Debitto promised.

The sunlight from the front yard burned Jasdero's eyes as it bounced off the bleach snow. He scanned his surroundings, taking note of how different it was compared to his room's window view. Debitto

had already dragged out the Christmas lights and a ladder. After getting set up, Debitto called for his twin. "Okay I need you to hold this so I can hang these lights, do you understand?" Jasdero nodded. Firmly

Jasdero placed his digits upon the metal sides.

"Is this good? "Inquired Jasdero.

"Perfect." Debitto praised, then began to climb the steel ladder.

The lights dangled from across the front side of the house like a crib's mobile during the late evening hours. It had taken Debitto most of the day, but after seeing the bright beaming snowflake-shaped

lights, he was pleased that he had invested the time and effort in putting them up. He was also glad that he had brought Jasdero outside to help him.

"Pretty…" Jasdero muttered, catching his brother's attention.

"Took us long enough!" Debitto responded, "But I guess it was worth the trouble…wanna go back?" Debitto was then cut off by a snowball hitting the side of his face. After wiping the cemented snowflakes off his

cheek, Debitto was greeted by Jasdero's grin. "Ohh you think that's funny!" Debitto retorted, scooping up a collection of white slush and launching it at his brother.

The twins began what seemed like a nearly full blown war. Jasdero took the left side of the front yard and Debitto took the right, the middle ground was marked by a large pole from the porch that stuck of

the earth. It seemed almost non-humanly possible for the amount of snowballs that were flying through the air. Numb limbs didn't stop either of the twins nor did Penelope when she strolled into the middle of

Debitto territory, wondering what the two there doing.

"What's going on here?" she inquired. Jasdero spoke up.

"Snowball fight!" The blonde's cheery comeback only exasperated Penelope, and she turned to him.

"Who was asking you?!" she snapped back. Seconds afterwards there was a thump that seemed to echo across the front yard. A slow paced turn only added more humor to the incident. "Did you just through a

snowball at me?" Penelope spat. Debitto tried hard to hide his smirk, but failed. "How. Old. Are. You?!" Penelope exploded.

"Twenty four, why?" blared Debitto. Penelope began to throw a fit.

"If you want to go act like a stupid little kid with your stupid brother, fine, I don't care, but leave me out of it!" she then stomped off, back into the house, with Debitto following behind her.

"Penelope calm down, I didn't mean to make you mad!" Bellowed Debitto. Jasdero continued to sit behind his snow fort, while Debitto had left him in the front yard. Jasdero faced what he had been yearning for

since he moved in with Debitto and Penelope: a choice. Sadly it would be short lived freedom, but liberation nonetheless. He watched Debitto pay no attention to him as he ran after his beloved. Jasdero was

finally left with his own choice: either to follow Debitto back into the house, or run off. The voices told him to run off, to chase down every snowflake that passed his cherry cheeks, but what sane part of his lobes

not tainted by the mental illness told him otherwise. Debitto had promised to not let Jasdero run off, or worse, hurt another person. His brother's promise to his future wife still rung in Jasdero's ears, along with

the torment of the thought that Penelope had seeded within his brain that he scared people. The knot in his stomach tightened and Jasdero knew that the only choice he truly had was to go back home, back to

his room, back to begging for Penelope's mercy anytime she was angered. Jasdero dragged himself back inside, catching a glance of Debitto caressing Penelope in the kitchen. He went unnoticed by both parties.

"You know I love you," Debitto muttered.

"I'm sorry…" uttered Penelope.

"It's okay. You're pregnant. It's probably just hormones…"Debitto whispered. Jasdero felt a slight twist in his stomach as Debitto moved to kiss Penelope's cheek. "I love you." Another long caress of each of their

lips. Jasdero decided to leave the two alone, that even if he were to interrupt their moment of cuddling that it wouldn't change a single thing. They would still get married, they would still have their child, and they

would still live happily ever after, without Jasdero. Slyly the golden haired man made his way upstairs not to disturb the _loving _couple.

Creeping into his bed, Jasdero couldn't shake the thoughts of Penelope with his brother; it brought back memories of a time he wished to forget.

_My self-consciousness didn't allow my tongue to craft words when the man of my dreams' ears could hear them. All the compounds of letters that my brain fashioned were only to be sabotaged somewhere _

_between their starting point, my brain, and their major destination, my mouth. That was my entire freshman year, being tongue-tied every time my nerves got the best of me. At first I wrote off the _

_homosexual feelings, just __a faze that I'd been going through since middle school…_

That night Jasdero dreamt of his youth, of mediocre days when Debitto had been a part of cross country.

_He had been on the same track team as Devit and I couldn't keep my eyes off him. I was a sophomore in high school and him graduating later that year, gave me a great sense of need to let him know that _

_every __time my pupils took a glimpse of him running around in that big old loop in track, I wanted to call him mine. But it was the late seventies and such things were taboo. I was to fall in love with a woman, and _

_him to __have the same fate. If I were a girl mother would have been more than pleased for me to bring him home, even if he was dirt poor. Devit and he were acquaintances, how I desired for the friendship of my _

_crush, __to break away from my social awkwardness and become as outgoing as my twin. Sadly that never happened. I would always be bonded to my bashful nature, forever._

Jasdero's dreaming only distraught him. Twisting and turning only helped his blankets tangle his body within their spider web. He woke up in a cold sweat, only to have disturbed his 'friends.' Smashing his

pillow against his ears, Jasdero begged for them to quit their chatter until morning. They refused like usual and continued their nonsense gibber to only make Jasdero more of an insomniac.

* * *

So I hope everyone who read this chapter liked it! Well next chapter is going to be all about Devit and what he does at the tooth brush factor! jk I don't think I'm going to actually put what the factor that he

works at makes... and I'm also not too sure if its going to be a factory, maybe it can be a place where the workers have to work at a cubicle, wouldn't that be fun! anyways, I have started working on chapter four

and I hope to actually finish this fic unlike most of my writings ~


	4. Don't feel like writing this anymore

So I've decided that I really don't feel like writing this story anymore. Mainly because I don't feel like I did enough research on some of the topic presented within the story. Sorry if anything I wrote offended anyone, I really tried my best with what information I was given from teachers and what internet research I did in my free time. Along with my own displeasement of research I also don't find myself wanting to write this anymore, I do have the beginning of the chapter four wrote but like stated before I have no interest in writing anymore of it. Maybe in the future I'll pick it up again but right now I'm not too thrilled with it.

Thank you to all that read this first fanfiction of mine! I loved the reviews from all of you, (even if it was only four people D ) and I hope that you enjoyed reading this story!

( Sorry if this reset my story at the top of the index or the updated/recently published fics list, I know its not all that popular, I just wanted to tell whoever followed this story how I really felt about it so they won' think I was going to update anytime soon)


End file.
